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Well, I had to either work today or goto class. It was one or the other as far as I could work out. So I thought, but on the board it showed that everyone had to work today. Very confusing, very annoying and very… wrong, so it seemed. So I thought I rather be safe than sorry so I went down there anyway. Only to be told they didn’t need me today, which I much preferred.

Before while in bed sleeping, (in rem state) my mind sub-conscience created a dream for me. I always consider the dreams to be more than dreams, but the human mind delving into other unknown realities as we know it.

Alas, I was back home in England in my parents house in the halls and rooms, but I hardly remember what I was doing in the first one. But the second segment of this dream, before I woke I was out in the front and a shadow was creeping up on me. I told the shadow I didn’t want to go back, I told it I wanted to stay at home. I begged a few times to the creeping shadow as it got closer and as I retreated back to the house. In the end it got me and took me back to Israel to this kibbutz.

I think this dream is very clear to me, my sub-conscience is home sick. But there felt a reality inside this place and it felt nice to be back at home if only for the short time it was. Even if the home was slightly edited with a different road at the side that was not there in the physical reality. Other houses missing… ect. But it was still home. I do miss it, but I am here for now.

Another aspect I have in my personality is the shadow, I am a shadowy type of person in many respects, I cast darkness and gloom into otherwise light area’s of life. At the same it, it is an element that exists yet, do we truely understand the shadow. I think there are many questions to be asked of it and to maybe ask it. Even in my gaming state I sometimes refer to myself as Lord of Shadow, maybe I am closer to it than I thought before. Sometimes I feel I am bound to the shadow. Beyond that of our physical world.